Saturday, March 31, 2012

TRIFEXTRA: Placid

This post is in response to Trifecta's Trifextra weekend challenge:
"Write a horror story in 33 words, without the words blood, scream, died, death, knife, gun, or kill. Good luck."

PLACID

The pool. Dear God! She ran. A broken lock. A jammed door. Both barriers in her nightmare. She saw him flailing, gasping for breath. The water became eerily calm. She was too late. 



22 comments:

  1. Oh good God. How terrifying. The jammed door is the brilliant part. without that, it lacks the kick in the face.

    one of your best.

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  2. It made me feel anxious writing it. Totally horrifying experience.

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  3. This one was one of the most horrible.

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  4. Good job!
    I got tense reading it!

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    1. I was totally tense writing it. UGH! Gonna cover it up with a happy post now. :P

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  5. This is one of my worst fears. Thank goodness we don't have a pool, or I'd have driven myself (and those around me) nuts with all my worrying.

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  6. Aw, this is very sad. You packed a lot into 33 well-chosen words.

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  7. I grew up with a pool in the back yard, so this was all too possible in my mind. Packed quite a punch - and yet, that eerie feeling lingers, too. Great write. Peace, Amy
    http://sharplittlepencil.com/2012/03/30/1955-trifecta-disturbing-photo-included/

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    1. Thank you, Amy. Sometimes the more realistic the story, the more horrifying.

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  8. This is really terrifying. And she saw the struggle... Powerful story in 33 words!

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  9. Oh jesus, I can't even think about this. Too true. And the jammed door? No no no.

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    1. I know. Real life horror is the worst kind, in my opinion.

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  10. Any parents worst nightmare!

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  11. Thanks so much for linking up with Trifecta this week. Hope to see you back on Monday (10 am Eastern) for the new prompt and some exciting news about the changes Trifecta is making to spread the word about our writing community.

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  12. Absolutely horrifying. The 'could have made it but....' that you did with the door was a great touch. Great job.

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