Tuesday, February 5, 2013

Professional Football Players vs. Moms

Me: "Mags just projectile vomited. I'll be back in a little while."

That was my text Sunday night to Michele as were hosting a Super Bowl Twitter party called #FootballForWomen. Thanks to all who came and tweeted along! 

But, it's just not a party until someone pukes. Well, technically it's still a party even if no one tosses their cookies, but poor Mags had a horrible stomach bug. We thought she was over the worst of it, until it started up again...all over her bed and Chris

I gave Chris the choice of bed, night table, stuffed animal and carpet cleanup OR child cleanup. Since he and Mags had just bonded over puke on their shirts, he chose her. While I was feverishly scrubbing the carpet and stripping her bed,  I could hear the game going on in the background. My mind wandered and the following chart was what came about in my thoughts. Enjoy!


How are professional football players and moms similar?  



PROFESSIONAL FOOTBALL PLAYERS
MOMS
Lick their fingers before touching the ball.
Lick their fingers to clean a child’s face.

Gets tackled when running with the ball.
Gets tackled when holding fruit snacks.

Dances when they score a touchdown.
Dances when their kid poops in the potty.

Calls a timeout to freeze a kicker.
Calls a timeout to punish a kicker.

Works hard to get 10 yards per play.
Works hard to clean 10 yards per day.

Has a uniform covered in stains at the end of the game.
Has a shirt covered in stains at the end of the day.


Writes X’s and O’s on a chalkboard.

Writes X’s and O’s on notes in a lunchbox.


WAAAAAAIT! JUST ONE MORE THING BEFORE YOU GO! 

I'm in the running for this contest. I'd love any 
help you could give. It's simple! 

1. Click the frilly button below.
2. Scroll down to find According to Mags
3. Click "Vote". 
4. THANK YOU SO MUCH! 

 And if you are looking for other funny ladies to vote for, might I recommend, 
Michele, from Old Dog New Tits, as well as Hot Mess Mom
Kelley's Break Room and the lovely ladies of the 
Sisterhood of the Sensible Moms.
You can vote every 24 hours and for as many people as you like. 
Thanks!

17 comments:

  1. Great job, Mel! This was perfect. Maybe there needs to be vomit in your house more often. You know, for inspiration.

    Hope everyone is feeling better!

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    Replies
    1. Thanks so much. :) I know. Maybe the vomit helps my brain.

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  2. LOL this was great! So very very true too :-)

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  3. I'm cracking up at timeout to freeze a kicker vs. timeout to punish a kicker. Hope your little one feels better soon!

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    Replies
    1. IT's so true, though, isn't it? Thanks for visiting!

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  4. Oh, I love that chart! And hope your little one is on the mend.

    best,
    MOV

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  5. This chart is brilliant! Mom's win every time.

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  6. Great list you came up with!
    So does this mean vomit is the mother of creativity?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. HAHA! I'm thinking so, Guap! But not recommended. :)

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  7. This was very, very good, my dear. I hope you link it many places. And it was a privilege hosting with you. Thanks for the shout out! XOXO :)

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  8. that is BEGGING to be PINNED, I will put it on my Pinterest board right now.
    I hope Mags is feeling better today and you are too. I know you were really sick too...it's been a really long week.

    HUGS sweets!

    ReplyDelete