Wednesday, June 26, 2013

My Achilles Heel...Literally

Mags: "Mama, don't worry. You're really super slow right now, but you'll get better. Maybe by the time you're 100, you'll be running faster...because you'll be part robot by then."

Me: "Interesting. Thanks for the encouragement, Mags."

For the past billion ten weeks, I've been recovering and healing. From what you ask? An Achilles injury that happened a full two years ago. I attempted physical therapy way back when the numbing and tingling in my heel began. I thought it was getting better, when in reality, it wasn't. Not even close.

You see, I've never given myself time to heal when it comes to running. I've always jumped back in too hard and too fast. As I've aged, this has seemed more and more stupid to me. (Mama, we don't say stupid!) Sorry, I meant, "silly." So, I've taken the past ten weeks off to heal it right this time, work with a physical therapist I enjoy (Thanks, Jules!) and to think about the following:

  • Do I really LOVE running?
  • Am I a RUNNER?
  • Would I be DEVASTATED if I couldn't run again?

When I sat, thought about it and talked with Chris about it, all these questions ended up with the same answer...I don't think so.

Fifteen years ago, I WAS a RUNNER. I LIVED, BREATHED and ATE running. I RAN daily with a team of women that I adored. But, since then, I've started and stopped training multiple times. I've recovered from shin splints, a stress fracture, and an ankle sprain in that time. And now, I'm at the point where a painful injury that wouldn't heal is finally showing progress. I don't want to risk it again. I'm a a fork in the road.

My cousin, Brit,  wrote a comment that summed it all up for me perfectly:

"Runners logic; damn it, I got hurt from running, I can't wait to get better so I can run again." 

He's exactly right. Why would I want to do this all over again? There's lots of other activities out there to explore. For instance, in two weeks, I'm going to WALK the 5K Color Run with Mags and her godmother, Christie. That will be something I've never done before. But after that, I think I'm going to untie my shoes for a while and take time to really figure out what I like to do. All I know is, right now, running isn't it. 

Have you ever been at a crossroads? 
Feel free to share with me in the comments.

1 comment:

  1. It's not only the injuries you spoke about, but it will eventually take its toll on your knee joints as well.